I have spoken to many people who have told me that they have learned to let go of grudges by either letting go of their anger, being committed to not becoming a grudge-holder like one of their parents or having the insight that it was only making them feel worse for holding onto it.
Recently in discussions with people, we have come up with the most effective way to let go of a grudge.
And that is to apologize to the person you're holding it towards. You can even do this to people who have died.
Here are the steps to follow:
Realize that you have control over what and how you say this, but you don't have any control over how they'll hear it. The good thing is that it doesn't actually matter how they'll receive and respond to it. That's because after you have this conversation you'll think to yourself, "I can't be more gracious and classy than that," and you will feel better about yourself no matter what they do.
Now please give this a try and report back to us in the comments how it worked out.
In the meantime, take good care of yourself and don't begrudge yourself.